1.) you spend more than 50% of your time in bed, alternatively longing for your bed.
-I haven't slept this much in ages, much because my back's been hurting so goddamn much that I haven't been able to lie still for more than about 20 min. at a time, and pretty much started crying of pain as soon as I moved. Now I can lie down flat without much pain - BLISS!
2.) you eat the wierdest things, and everything tastes either amazing/not a thing.This will generally be because you have been sick long enough to not do shopping, or that you are too tired/sick/achy to actually bother about what you eat. Alternatively your head spins too much you just grab the first best thing.
-Brunch; 2 karelska piroger with the last remaining hommous, a banana, tea, finished off some youghurtraisins and youghurtcashwes I found in a bowl, finished off some paellalike thing I had in the fridge. Half a cream, custard, jam, marzipan bomb my dear sister brought. My next to last cigarette. A breakfast bar (I was very very hungry)
-Dinner; curry instant noodles with ketchup (tasted GREAT), the remaining custard/cream/marzipan bomb, tea, last cigarette..
(Looking at old pictures from my trip to Örebro in September 11 makes me happy!)
3.) you grown so loudly of pain that your cats look very perplexed and confused at you, wondering why you are making SOO much noise
4.) you are dressed in the WIERDEST of things, and you don't even care going dressed that way to the hospital
-today's fashionable outfit is leggings, a wool scarf around my lower back, giant woolly socks, inherited LONG sweatpants (I don't own practical clothes), white wool legwarmers on top, woolly mansized sweater tucked inside sweatpants, massive hoodie on top, scarf. Topped off by fashionably punkinspired hair standing up to all imaginable directions. Luckily I had a shower and hairwash just before I lost mobility, so I am reasonably clean and wellsmelling, thank god for that.
this one makes me smile! always! <3
5.) You are soppy and sentimental, alternatively irritable and angry
-generally from lack of sleep, pain and just the shitness of life induced by sickness
6.) If you are single you think; why the HELL am I single, being sick whilst single SUCKS!
If you are NOT single you think; thank GOD for not being single
(alternative 3. you think why the hell am I single, then your sister turns up with baked goods, your friends call to see if they can help you, your other sister +husband act as your personal drivers, your boss calls you to tell you not to worry about having the week off - and you think, hey life is not that bad after all. relationship status is not all)
7.) in the middle of the night, when things are always the worst (tired, in pain, sniffling, feeling sorry for yourself, not being able to sleep), you make bargains with god/the devil/the universe/yourself that when you get well, THEN- then you will start a NEW LIFE, with exercise, good food, good sleeping habits, never smoke again, never drink again etc etc etc
-this usually does not apply when you actually regain healt.
sunny days!
8.) You repeadedly think 'Why wasn't I happier when I was well?!' , 'Why didn't I wake up every single morning, skipping out of bed screaming in extacy I can jump I can skip, I am W.E.L.L!?!'
-fact is, we (humans) rearly appriciate good health until we have poor health, and when we get well again we forget about being sick again. I guess it's something to do with the brain's survival instinct and coping capacity...
stripes, laughter and drawn on mustaches
9.) you make the wierdest of plans for the future, which all seem perfectly sane at the time of the sickness condition. Most of them seem a lot less sane in a normal condition....
(mine at the moment include brilliant work ideas, travelling plans and flying unicorns...)
10.) You realise which people you miss most in your life - and hopefully this is something you bring into your healthy life as well
-I miss my friends in faraway places, increadibly much! and I miss having the concentration capacity, ability to sit, time (well now I have time, but not the ability to sit...) and money to be in touch more, to visit more!
But dearest darlings remember this;
*Rosita darlingest, you are in my thoughts daily, as soon as things pan out a bit more, more work, more money, less bad health etc I will make a visit to Örebro, it is long overdue and I miss you like hell!
*Kim, love you to bits, you are amazing and clever and wonderful and I hope your first few days at your new work have been brilliant - Kick their asses sugar!!
*Michelle my belle - you are my shining star, thanks for EVERYTHING the last few months - hope you are awesome and kicking London ass as usual!
*Sonita - I am sorry I am so shit with being in touch, too much going on right now, but I am thinking of you all the time! as soon as I am better we'll skype!
*Soffi, Elin och Sofia; Ni är alltid där i topp! alltid i mina hjärtan! saknar er! <3
11.) This blog entry took about an hour and a half to write, standing up, jumping around every now and then to exercise, eating in between, answering phonecalls....
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